Hiding or detaching temporarily from emotional pain is a healthy skill. If you have something hurtful happen, but you need to “get your act together” in order to work, or watch children, then knowing you can do that rather than being besieged by your pain, reflects emotional competence. However, people with Perfectly Hidden Depression have […]
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The Beck Depression Inventory has been used to identify depression for many years. But it will miss those with Perfectly Hidden Depression, due to the fact that they’d rarely allow themselves to reveal their pain, not even to a computer. Even people with more moderate classic depression may discount or deny their symptoms — no […]
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“I love you, but….” How do we handle criticism, even “constructive criticism” from people we care about? Often, not too well. That could be a problem with how it’s delivered, how we hear it, or both. Dr. Margaret discusses what makes critical feedback so difficult and offers ten ideas of how to get out of […]
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Today’s podcast is a little unusual. Dr. Margaret’s telling a bit of her own love story with the man she married almost 28 years ago. She wrote a post about their marriage in 2014 that went viral on The Huffington Post, which she’s going to share with you, along with a few back stories of […]
Anger. It’s not an emotion that many people know how to express well. And some even believe it’s to be avoided at all costs. Where do we get those beliefs? And what are the different ways we let each other know we’re angry? Dr. Margaret discusses how to express anger, and why often it’s important […]
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“My mother was many things — lovely, talented, and she had a prescription drug addiction.” This is the very personal story of Dr. Margaret’s own mom, how anxiety and addiction affected her life and the lives of those who loved her. She had what would now be called Generalized Anxiety Disorder and obsessive-compulsive traits, and […]
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13 Reasons Why, the explosively haunting Netflix series focusing on teenagers, is giving our culture a message. It’s about bullying, drug and alcohol use, sexual assault, anxiety and alienation caused by the cruel use of social media, depression and suicide. Not that only parents of teens should listen to this podcast! Dr. Margaret points out […]
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What does it feel like to live with mental illness, such as panic disorder or bipolar disorder? In this episode, Dr. Margaret tells her story of having and managing panic attacks, as performed in the local This Is My Brave program. In rehearsal, she met the young Caitlin McDowell, whose stunning piece on living with bipolar disorder […]
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Any time you can claim intention, it’s empowering. Letting go of children and avoiding the depression that can come from “empty nest?” You can decide to handle that transition with intentionality as well. Dr. Margaret offer specific ideas and references to help you do just that — and the process starts way before your children […]
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You may not believe you experience FOMO, the recent acronym for the “fear of missing out.” But wait until you hear actual quotes from people who do, and you may hear yourself! Here’s one: “I can see from her SnapChat that she went out with all of our friends. I ended the friendship with her, but […]
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Eating disorders and body image problems are rampant in our culture, with good reason. We are pummeled with images of the “acceptable” body, which is much younger, fitter, and probably photo-shopped. Dr. Margaret is talking today about the different kinds of eating disorders, her own history with anorexia and three non-scale things you can begin […]
If you’re an expert at hiding emotional pain, and do it almost perfectly, then this episode is likely to speak to you. Dr. Margaret has been researching and writing about a syndrome she calls Perfectly Hidden Depression for three years. Listen in as she outlines the ten major traits of PHD in the detail that […]
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Vulnerability is the presence of a sensitivity, a painful hurt or a struggle. In this episode of SelfWork, Dr. Margaret explores how recognizing your vulnerability is pragmatically important in managing mental illness. Accepting and revealing these tender aspects of yourself is also vital in deeply connecting with others, and with developing a greater understanding of […]
Understanding narcissism is difficult. But if you’re a person who’s trying to love someone with a lack of empathy, the tendency to be quite self-involved, and to need an incredible amount of attention or praise, he or she could have narcissism. It’s vital to know what it is and how it affects relationships. What’s important […]
Change, whether it’s welcome and wanted, or unwelcome and difficult, involves stress. Today’s podcast is about living with both kinds, as well as the sometimes bizarre ways people try to avoid the reality of change. What are the most stressful life transitions for adults and children? And what is the most successful way people can […]
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What do Bruce Springsteen (The Boss), Jay Guillermo (collegiate football player), Kid Cude (rapper) and Princess Diana (not the Disney kind) all have in common? They’ve suffered with chronic mental illness, revealed it, and talked openly about it. Prejudice against mental illness is alive and well, but we can all fight it, both within ourselves, […]
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Individual therapy can be emotionally difficult, although well worth it. Couples therapy? In some ways, it’s even harder, as two people who are more or less demoralized try to remedy problems that have been around for quite a while. With both nurturing and directness, Dr. Margaret identifies the four major signs of relationship disaster (researched […]
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Abusive relationships, whether the abuse is emotional, physical or sexual, can be extremely difficult to leave. Yet many people will shrug their shoulders, saying, “If someone treated me like that, I’d be out the door.” What is that old saying? “Walk a mile in my shoes….”. This podcast is all about the complication of abusive […]
Gratitude is a wonderful thing, right? It definitely is when it’s demonstrated and expressed in relationships, whether they be an intimate one, a good friend, or even perhaps with perfect strangers. But can it be a problem? Today we’ll be talking about the importance of gratitude in partnerships, especially when there are children involved. Two […]
Divorce is tough, no matter how amicable. If you or someone you love is considering divorce, this episode of SelfWork will walk you through what you may be able to expect. Dr. Margaret offers some surprising facts about divorce, and reveals six ways to be your best self during what can be a difficult life […]
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What does it mean to feel emotionally grown up? Feeling mature, decisive, not being reactive but responsive, having insight into our own behavior and changing that behavior when it’s appropriate – when we can do these things, we are acting in our adult selves. So much of how or how long that takes depends on what […]
Emotional abuse is very real for many, When it comes from a parent, the damage done can horrific and life-altering. This is a complex issue — and Dr. Margaret talks about it with understanding and compassion for all involved Today’s post describes a mother who meets criteria for what’s termed Borderline Personality Disorder, (BPD) which is a way […]
Loving someone who is trying to heal from depression can be a tough job. So here’s some help! In this podcast, Dr. Margaret gives you tangible tips (Dr. M’s focus is always, “What you can do about it!”) and thoughtful recognitions. Included is a brief rundown of the different modes of depression itself, and special […]
Shame can be a tremendously destructive force in our lives. This podcast will help you learn how to identify shame in yourself, and gives specific suggestions on how to work through it. Shame is usually present in the form of self-loathing or constant thoughts about yourself that are negative or make you feel as if […]
Welcome back to SelfWork! Today’s podcast is all about the skills of listening — really listening. We all get into such bad habits, and learning how to effectively hear and respond to another person, especially someone you love, can make a huge change in how your relationship works and feels. You may have heard yourself […]
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