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The SelfWork Podcast

I'm Dr. Margaret, a psychologist for over 25 years and the author of Perfectly Hidden Depression. I created The SelfWork Podcast in 2016 to explain mental health treatment, and to give you the chance to consider therapy without thinking it's weird or somehow suggests you can't "fix" your own problems. My team is so honored that five years later, SelfWork has earned nearly 3.5 million downloads! Each episode features the popular listener question. And, once a month, you’ll hear a “You Get the Gist” segment - a five minute run-down of a current topic - as well as an interview with an outstanding guest author or expert, adding to the wide diversity of topics listeners so appreciate. Regularly rated as one of the top mental health/depression podcasts out there, I keep it short and casual - and I'd love to hear from you. Please join me.
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Now displaying: December, 2023
Dec 29, 2023

You’re getting back (or will be soon) to the office or to work or school.. and you start hearing about what everyone else did over the holidays. Maybe you’ve already seen stuff on social media that seems to tell their story. Maybe you’ve scrolled Instagram reels or watched hilarious TikToks. Your own life may shrink in comparison - especially if you're living in fear.

That's the topic for today. How to confront your fear of missing out (FOMO) or how to stop chasing the "next best thing" and instead, to live in joy (JOMO) or at least contentment. Here's Lauren Cook's and Dr. Cathy Sullivan Windt's definition of JOMO: "JOMO is the satisfaction one feels in the current moment, with accompanying acceptance of what one doesn’t have in that moment.” (their article is linked below...).

Vital Links:

Lauren Cook and Dr. Cathy Sullivan-Windt's wonderful article on JOMO:

An earlier SelfWork episode on FOMO

Advertiser’s Links:

Click HERE for the NEW fabulous offer from AG1 – with bonus product with your subscription!

Have you been putting off getting help? It's 2024, and BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

Dec 22, 2023

 

Today we’re going to focus on how the inner child model of therapy has been used and what exactly does it mean. Simply put (which to me is always the best way), how much does a client realize and connect with the idea that their past is influencing their present. I’ll offer a story about how that connection is made in therapy if it has not been so far. It’s definitely something that many struggle with – as they battle the belief that what happened years ago might be impacting who they think of themselves now.

The listener voicemail for today is one I somehow missed last year – and I apologize for that! Because it’s an excellent comment: How do therapists experience their own struggles with what the listener called “moral injury,” compassion fatigue and burnout?  I’ll look forward to talking about my own struggles and way of trying to achieve, or I should say maintain, my own stability as a therapist.

Advertisers' Links: 

We have a brand new sponsor of SelfWork - moonbird. What is it? It's the world’s first, tactile breathing coach designed to fit in the palm of your hand. To try it yourself, click here and use the code SELFWORK!

Have you been putting off getting help? BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

Vital Links:

VeryWell Mind article on inner child work

Forbes article on Internal Family Systems therapy

SelfWork Episode on Dissociative Identity Disorder with Lynn Barrett

Differences in moral injury and burnout

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

 

Dec 15, 2023

I've never laughed harder than in this interview with the self-proclaimed "failfluencer" Erin Diehl!

Erin is a Top 1% podcast host, Founder & CEO of improve it!, and one of the most electric keynote speakers in the world, using her work as an improvisational actor to teach you and me how our bodies are trying to give us messages about the healing that needs to happen. She's been on global stages with companies like Amazon, LinkedIn, and The Obama Foundation.

As a graduate from Clemson University, a former experiential marketing and recruiting professional, and a veteran improviser from the top improvisational training programs in Chicago--including The Second City, Erin can speak to anything from how every day of your life is an "improv scene" to the moment she discovered her chronic back pain was a result of unresolved emotional trauma.

Advertiser's Link:

Click HERE for the NEW fabulous offer from AG1 – with bonus product with your subscription!

Vital Links:

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

Dec 8, 2023

I received an email from one of you that saddened me. It opened with, “Listening to today’s podcast has left me feeling more hopeless than ever.”

Hopelessness. Feeling despair. And its counterpart – helplessness, which is believing that nothing can be done to prevent what’s happening - are two of the worst feelings of depression, and two of the ones non-depressed people often can’t seem to understand. Maybe even my own mantra that I repeat in almost every episode, “Look for what you can do about," for those who are fighting these two demons – sounds like I’m skimming the surface of deeper depressions and not talking about the heavy burden and darkness that you might feel.

Since I’ll be using much of this one listener’s email, we won’t feature another for today. I promise you this listener’s life holds much to be understood, and to have compassion for.

She did say toward the end, “I felt the need to write this.  Much of it has never seen the light of day.  Perhaps that alone might help?

I can only hope that featuring her email might help as well.

Advertisers' Links: 

We have a brand new sponsor of SelfWork - moonbird. What is it? It's the world’s first, tactile breathing coach designed to fit in the palm of your hand. To try it yourself, click here and use the code SELFWORK!

Have you been putting off getting help? BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

Vital Links:

Dr. Margaret's podcast episode on "stinkin' thinkin'

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

 

 

Dec 1, 2023

One of the reasons why many people suffer during the so-called “holiday” season is because it’s the first - or one more of many holidays - that they’re actively grieving a loved one’s death within the last year or even farther away – and they cannot seem to work through their grief enough to want to step back into life. Into living this moment that’s right before them.

I tuned into a Hidden Brain episode  this week that discussed a recently researched concept of grief in a very personal way, as resilience researcher Lucy Hone told the story of her own nightmare - the death of one of her children. So, I wanted to pass her ideas on to you – as you might be one of those people who are struggling with grief – and not knowing how to get out from under its shadow.

Our listener email is a from a listener who says he’s been diagnosed with what’s called “schizoaffective disorder” – and wonders if I know much about – or can help him with – intrusive thoughts that he can’t seem to rid himself of.

Advertiser's Link:

Click HERE for the NEW fabulous offer from AG1 – with bonus product with your subscription!

Vital Links:

Stroebe and Schut research in 1999

Resilient Grieving: How to Find Your Way Through Devastating Loss, by Lucy Hone, 2017

My own recent podcast on grief

Schizoaffective disorder symptoms

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

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